The Seedy Underside of High Politics

by "observers" as garnered by the editor-in-chief

Danish PM Unwittingly Sexually Harassed by Media Whores

In yet another media stunt, the media whores of the Alliance of European Nationalist Movements (AENM) tried to stage "a Berlusconi" during this weekend's summit. Nick Griffin and Bruno Gollnisch, were caught one evening outside the Wild Goose checking out Danish Prime Minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt personal details (and we’re not talking CV here…). Déjà vue? It already happened to her in October 2011 when Silvio Berlusconi, former PM of Italy, was also interested in the Danish PM's personal attributes.

Danish Minister of Justice - A Real Don Juan?

Rumors have surfaced, that Danish Minister of Justice Morten Bødskov has been seen partying hard on the penultimate night of the summit with at least three young women. Apparently he wins them over through a combination of Barry White and perhaps a serving of the ulitmate "cop cake", which he also submitted conference attendees to; the infamous Danish "lemon moon" ("citronmåne"). Though unsure about the connections between Barry White and law enforcement, the choice of lemon moon is unsurprising, as it is a stable part of the diet of Danish policemen and -women, and Mr. Bødskov's Ministry of Justice is presiding over Danish law enforcement.

Opposite Attract or Strange Bedfellows?

Perhaps the animosity between nationalist and Front National member, Bruno Gollnisch, and Amnesty International activist, "Last-Name-Unknown" Svend Erik. Though certainly coming to verbal blows at the final press conference, Svend Erik was seen giving Mr. Gollnish a solid, perhaps friendly or collegial(?) slap on the behind after the summit. No reprimand was given and apparently no offense taken. It was certainly neither a patting down search for hidden weapons or the type of "paddling" formerly used as a corrective against children (that would have been even more inappropriate coming from an Amnesty activist). What lay behind (no pun intended) this friendly exchange of body contact is unknown, but it certainly seem to relegate their conference altercation to the category of Potemkin villages.

Eurocrat Involved With DUI?

Leaving the summit, one high-ranking Eurocrat (identity unconfirmed) supposedly remarked if there was a way to make all alcohol evaporate from a human body on a short walk to the car. Whether this individual was driving, asking a hypothetical question, or making a joke is unknown. But it is certainly worrying that the future of Europe is in the hands of persons either willing to commit DUI or joke about it.

What Really Goes On Behind the Closed Doors (and why the doors are closed)

A Commission representative made what perhaps could have been a Freudian slip, when he said that the Danish presidency had really pleased them and the Commission was pleasing itself(!) What goes on behind all those closed doors?!? Is this some kind of strange EU benefit or perk? Certainly, it is not something that the Danish presidency remarked upon, but perhaps its members are too traumatized by the experience.

Bribery to Make Up for Bad Planning

Jose Manuel Barroso, President of the European Commission was desperate to not to get any kind of negative press coverage after the" misunderstanding" (according to themselves) or rather negligence of the Commission, who did not show up for an agreed upon press meeting. He then tried to bribe the journalist with chocolate, hoping that the mistake would not be pointed out. But how can we stay silent if such persons decide our future and that of Europe as well?

FUCK THE PRESS!

This was apparently the response from the Commission when its failed press strategy and bad managing and planning cost it the prominent position in the headlines one would expect. The exact words of this headline were apparently spoken behind closed doors, and certainly the effect was evident for all to see. Besides the final press conference, the Commission apparently decided to pretend the press doesn't exist, or at least that none of its journalists were present at the summit. This of course left the Commission completely vulnerable when the Council trounced it in the final hours of the summit, and it may even have jeopardized the final policy proposal's approval by the European Parliament.